Joined: Nov 17, 2004 Posts: 5222 Location: Tennessee, USA
Posted: Tue Nov 14, 2006 2:14 pm Post subject: Dear Abby
Dear Abby...
My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning, and, when I confront him, he denies everything. What's worse, everyone knows that he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Also, since he lost his job five years ago, he hasn't even looked for a new one. All he does all day is smoke cigars, cruise around and shoot the bull with his buddies while I have to work to pay the bills. Since
our daughter went away to college he doesn't even pretend to like me and hints that I may be a lesbian.What should I do?
Signed, Clueless...
Dear Clueless:
Grow up and dump him. Good grief, woman. You don't need him anymore.
You're a United States Senator from New York. Act like one!! _________________ http://twitter.com/HQ_Shark2th
Shark2th Moderator
Joined: Nov 17, 2004 Posts: 5222 Location: Tennessee, USA
Posted: Fri Feb 16, 2007 10:14 pm Post subject: Bill and Hillary
Hillary Clinton called Bill into her office one day and said, 'Bill, I have a great idea! I know how we can win back middle America and secure my presidential victory in 2008'.
'Great, but how so you propose we go about that, asked Bill?
Well, Hillary responds, We'll go down to a local Wal-Mart, get some cheezy clothes and shoes, like most middle Americans wear and then we'll stop at the pound and pick up a Labrador.
When we look the part we'll go to a nice old country bar in middle America, and we'll show them that we really enjoy the Countryside and show admiration and respect for the hard working people living there".
A few days later, all decked out and with the requisite Labrador at heel, they set off from New York in a westerly direction. Eventually they arrived at just the place they were looking for. With dog in tow they walk into the bar.
They step up to the bar and the Bartender takes a step back and say's, "aren't you Bill and Hillary Clinton ?"
Hillary answers, "yes we are, and what a lovely town you have here. We were just passing through and Bill suggested that we stop and take in some local color."
They then order a couple of cocktails from the bartender and proceed to drink them down, all the while chatting up a storm with anyone who would listen.
All of a sudden, the bar room door opens and a grizzled old farmer comes in. He walked up to the Labrador, lifted it s tail and looked underneath, shrugged his shoulders and walks out the door.
A few moments later, in came another old farmer. He walked up to the dog, lifted its tail, looked underneath, scratched his head and then left the bar.
Over the course of the next hour or so, another four or five farmers came in, lifted the dog's tail, and went away looking puzzled.
Eventually Hillary and Bill could stand it no longer and called the bartender over. 'Tell me' said Hillary, Why did all those old farmers come in and look under the dog's tail like that? Is it some sort of old custom?'
'Good Lord no,' said the bartender. 'Its just that someone has told them that there was a Labrador in this bar with two assholes!" _________________ http://twitter.com/HQ_Shark2th
hellblazer55 V.I.P. Lifetime
Joined: Oct 03, 2005 Posts: 6381 Location: Canada
Posted: Fri Feb 16, 2007 10:36 pm Post subject:
ha ha ha ha ha _________________
Shark2th Moderator
Joined: Nov 17, 2004 Posts: 5222 Location: Tennessee, USA
Posted: Thu Mar 29, 2007 8:48 pm Post subject:
Democratic Speaker of the House Nancy Peloci passes a recent funding bill, then passes a nasty "after lunch wind" with "W".
The President reacts.... _________________ http://twitter.com/HQ_Shark2th
enigma516 V.I.P. Lifetime
Joined: Feb 07, 2005 Posts: 2743 Location: Florida
Posted: Thu Mar 29, 2007 8:50 pm Post subject:
heh heh, those rule especially in a crowded elevator....lmao _________________
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